Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in tearyxeyes' LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, September 13th, 2005
8:21 pm	I really like someone. A lot...but i dunno. I'm confused due to the fact that others like to "talk" and make me think about other shit. and i'd say names if I could..but i'm not due to the fact that people are nosey and will get into my business, cosidering a few you who have friended me on this thing know me super super WELL.
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Friday, September 2nd, 2005
12:56 am	I've grown quite fond of Bayside, The lyrics are too catchy to not grow fond of them, plus i like the singers voice...kinda reminds me of matt skiba's(alkaline trio). It's unique.
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Monday, August 29th, 2005
6:13 pm	new livejournal account. add it up. http://livejournal.com/users/tokiiyoxrobot/
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Sunday, August 28th, 2005
4:09 pm	SO i saw SILVERSTEIN, scary kids scaring kids, underminded, etc yesterday. it was a pretty awesome show, i was so tired by the end of the night though. my friend alyssa decided to pay me a surprise visit at like 12am. or was it 11pm? i don't remember, but we were up for a super long time, and i did her hair this morning. it looks sweet. fgkdgjlfhj this fall silverstein's going on a fullblown tour, theyre gonna play with bayside, evergreen terrace, spitalfeild etc. can't wait. <3
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Friday, August 19th, 2005
2:56 pm	labels. Labels. Okay, so it's basically on everyone's "about me section"... "don't label me, i'm my own person, so fuck you and your idiotic labels, don't call me what i'm not!! because I'll break your fat face!!!" I will agree with you and say yes, labels deffiantely do suck. But people only call us scene, glam, hardcore,emo,indie,punk,fashion core...etc...based on: 1.What we look like. AND... 2. The music we listen to. Seriously get over it. Apparently, we are called these things because of what we look like. That's just the way it goes, and that's how it always will be. I get called scene by everyone all the time, and I seriously don't care anymore. If that's what people feel I look like, then so be it. I've accepted it.... and no it's not because I gave up on "individuality", I will always back that up, and agree that everyone is unique in their own little way, because you know what? it's true. Everyone's personality is different whether they're snobby, friendly, humerous..concieded. whatever. We're all different in that way, and that's what's always going to set us apart from others even though we have the same hair cut...or listen to the same types of music.(ps, did you notice that even personalitys are labeled??? "friendly, snobby etc!!!" I think it's just time to accept the fact that we live in a world of labels and stereotypes. People will always feel the need to think of us in certain way, or call us something we're not always going to feel comfortable with accepting. Just think of it this way, boxes are labeled so that we know what they contain. (television, dvd player, nintendo, etc) canned foods are labeled so that we know what we're opening. (tomatoe sauce, diced peaches, vegetable soup etc) clothes are labeled (whether it be "pants", shirt, skirt, shorts... or the designer who made it "Levi's", "Ralph Lauren", "diesel etc" hair is labeled..... "red head" "brunette" "blonde" Music is also labeled......punk, rock n' roll, indie, emo, screamo, grind, crust, hardcore, diso, metal, metal core, death metal, rap, elctro clash, country..... and you know what? alot of those have sub genres. or for example...a lot of today's popular bands contain more then one sound therefore having a mixed genere like.. post hardcore/emo/rock......make sence????? creatures are labeled.... fucking CATS!!! DOGSS!!! GIRAFFEEESSSSS! mammals, amphibians...reptiles... and if you really want to get into depth with this...there are also sub descriptions for just about everything...like amphibians=frogs,toads...etc...mammals=humans,dogs,horses.. basically anything that is capapble of caring for their "young/offspring" with lactaid secretions...aka milk! and is warm blooded. duh. the world is labeled... " sky" "grass" "tree" when it all comes down to it, just think of it like this, when we born we were given names, therefore we were labeled at birth. I was labeled Helen Pearl Anderson. Oh, and did I mention that on my birth certificate it says that i'm a female???? yes i'm labeled as a female too!! ROFL. okay so seriously, the point is, labels were meant to be whether you like it or not. and if you don't then just tell me "hey pearl, let's start calling stuff "blah" because labels suck and so do you for labeling things, god you're such a bad person!!!" the end. Now bring on the harsh criticism, or the all of the "i agree with you's" because I know people are going to want to kill me after typing this shit out...but you do have to admit that this kind of makes sense. A LOT of sense.
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Saturday, August 13th, 2005
5:40 am	sick. I was sick all day yesterday..and i didn't even fall asleep untill late last night, It's 5:40am and i'm already up....i don't know how long this is gonna last. I've pretty much had no appetite for about a month and have eaten very very little in that time...i guess the fact that i couldn't eat fucked my stomach up? yeah i'm really sick.and i swear it is the crappiest thing ever, I want it to end now. The last time something like this happened it lasted for about two and a half months.and i ended up losing an unhealthy amount of weight. I seriously hope it won't go that far. I can't go throught that again. I was sooo scared.
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Friday, August 12th, 2005
6:21 pm	fgldk;h so im thinking about visiting andrew soon since i didn't make it last time. and yeah im gonna move out as soon as i can. i think my parents would like that honestly. haha ps i feel sick. ugh.
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Thursday, August 11th, 2005
7:08 pm	Today was quite an interesting day...uh yeah. i met david today and it was wonderful<3
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Wednesday, August 10th, 2005
5:59 pm	sucks. Yeah, so today pretty much sucks. and wow, i havn't updated this since like september. isn't that cool? not really, but yeah.My friend was supposed to see me today but i couldn't find anyone to go pick him up, and the sad part is that he's only half an hour away from where i'm at. My friend was supposed to go get him but like...yeah it didn't happen and no one picked him up. And i swear i was so upset because it seems like it's been forever since we've been planning this. And then he kept friggin calling me to see if i was upset...and obviously i was....and yeah that didnt help the situation...he sounded pretty upset too. ugh. okay enough with this. umm so i'm gonna try and go to th silverstein show at the end of this month. their new cd comes out on the 16th, i can't wait! umm so yeah..there are two shows, one at the troubador in hollywood, and one at the glasshouse in pomomna, for those of you who live near me, you're very welcome to come along! i still have a friend that can get me some free tickets...so yeah!
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Thursday, September 23rd, 2004
11:06 am	thought todays wierd....today will be my second day of school....eeekkk i go full time now..im no longer a part time student..i have soo much work to do and i havnt even started. my problem is that i procrastinate way tooo much. eeeekkk im so tired. i went to bed at 3am last night. hmmmmm okay. ummmm Did you all know that im single once again???!as of 2 weeks ago! ehh haha it gets boring not bieng involved with anyone but i guess it is kind of a relief to be "free". you dont really have to worry about what the other person is doing or thinking and wether or not things will turn out just fine the next day.Ive come to the conclusion that I need to take things as they come. I need to let time run its course and not rush myself into something that will end up hurting me because i jumped into something to quickly. im just going to enjoy life and let it run its own course. I will take it slow and enjoy it..whatever it is that will come my way will come my way.. this will be by pure chance..not because i pursued it. things usually work best this way, or so ive heard. Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: My American Heart
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Thursday, September 16th, 2004
12:05 pm	stuff ive been up to hmmmm so since ive last written in this journal, i was mostly babbeling on about how often i was getting sick.im actually all better now.I ended up losing like 15 pounds but other then that im actually pretty good. on monday i was in gardengrove/anaheim cali. that was pretty fun, my friends and i went to the block of orange(huge outdoor shopping mall/district and then we went to the movies..had lunch and OoOooo bought disneyland tickets. i also met my new friend duc. hes pretty cool. It was fun talking to him....hanging out. its always cool making new friends. ha, oh yeah...tuesday was amazingly boring. i went to school, took a long nap, sat on my bum and did nothing!!! sounds like fun right???!! hmm, yesterday i had fun. tim came and picked me up and we went to the movies and junk. We watched exorcist/the begginning. god, it was sooooooooo groce..hhmmmm lets seee...theres nothing else to say..but yeah im bored. Current Mood: cheerful Current Music: Mae
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Thursday, August 12th, 2004
7:30 am	tired I dont think I'll have time to update this later on...so I'll do it now. its 7:30 am...im soooo very tired. todays my last day of class. in about two hours ill go turn in my work and maybe take a few exams, but this will be it untill september, so im pleased! this means ill get to sleep in a while.eh, today is deffinately going to be a long day.Its hot and i dont feel perfectly well.when i get home im seriously going to take a nice long nap in front of my humungous fan.=) Current Mood: sleepy
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Tuesday, August 10th, 2004
9:24 pm	love, a sort of view i have...pain..love..a piece i wrote. it is as though you simply took your bow and shot an arrow straight through my heart.why did you have to be a master in archery? why was i the target?? the pain is much too intense. but i guess thats love?? its strange you know,i get the same exact feeling when you and I are apart. i never realized that love could feel this way... and in some cases in a way of pain is how you pay. ive only had my heart broken once, something i hope and pray i wont have to go through twice. unfortunately i remember each and every feeling i once had to endure, all of the hurt..every tear. how i had to hide how i felt and not let that boy "win". i dohbt he could see through me for i am not a girl of translucsent feelings..but any person who knew me well enough somehow was able to see through me, and look straight into my heart, into my deepest feelings. I suppose not all people are blinded with ignorance. A few were able to see that yes, as i walked passed i held my head up high,but im sure they all noticed my high noon shadow wilted..dying like a lilly in the sun.if i find my one love, or better yet someone that i can love currently......i would say that things would be perfectly nice. if you are the one I am meant to love, i guarantee you it wont be anything to regret,ill simply take you by the hand, drag you to a far off place...my kisses,my love. it is all you will come to know. i promise i wont let one single tear run down your cheek, unless of course its out of sheer happiness. i wont be the one to take that sharp jagged piece of glass and puncture your heart. i refuse to be the one that will tear you apart. ill be here for u as long as youre here for me, take the time, discover, see. i promise you all of this, and i always keep my word. now my only hope is that perhaps you will think in an identical manner..will you take my heart in your hands and handle it cautiously. its fragile my love, this you should know.one piercing pain will be the end of me..my tears will have no where to flee and flood the world with pain and agony. my tears will will bleed black for i will be dead inside.But its your choice. will you take this delicate piece of glass and let it shatter on the ground? would you care if i frowned? i know i like you.now i guess ill wait to see if another scar will be placed over my heart. another wound exposed to the harsh open air. by Pearl Anderson Current Mood: artistic Current Music: fugazi
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Wednesday, August 4th, 2004
11:28 am	food so i finally got the guts to eat, ive only had a little bit of vegetable/noodle soup but its light and it helps.I still dont eat much, but atleast im trying to eat something at all. I dont want to keep getting sick so i guess its good that im forcing myself to eat. I do not want to develope an eating disorder...some people think that is whats happening..but you know what? i wont let it happen. I'm going to take care of myself, and i will overcome this! okay, on to other things...so ive went out with a boy named kris twice so far, he's told me he's grown very fond of me. I must admit, so have I. He's soooo adorable, he has a beautiful smile, hes well mannered..the list can go on forever. you get the point! Last night, besides the fact that i was still feeling sick..i had fun! kris picked me up and we went to the long beach town center.It was great!! we had loads of childish fun at the arcade it was great, we were both laughing hysterically.Two hours after he dropped me off he called just say he missed me. how cute is that?? haha okay well i must go, class work is calling my name. boring. oh my! okay farewell, leave comments! Current Mood: calm Current Music: Mineral
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Thursday, July 29th, 2004
10:07 pm	sleepy These past few days have been quite odd, i think my sleeping pattern is a bit disoriented right now, it is totally screwed ive gotten aproximately 0 hours of sleep within the last 30 hrs., but yes i have a date with a lovely young boy this weekend and then next saturday i am going to a party uptown. It will be loads of fun! oh and i took a few new pics of my hair. so i will post one of the pics! this ones my favorite.well one of them pictures of pearl!! farewell!<3 XOXOX
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Sunday, July 25th, 2004
8:17 pm	stuff ha I cant get over my hair. I like it alot. i took a few more pictures and they are haawt! i'll upload them later and show you all. hehe anywho, I was supposed to go to kris's party today....and well, i have no ride. so im stuck here. But hey, the good news is that i will be gone the whole day on saturday.I get to go uptown. yay! Im quite pleased. Oh! OoOoOo and since when does a boy give you his phone number? doesnt the girl usually do that?(woot! i got a cute boys number) haha im amazed by the way people do things these days. well, im off to go eat some dinner. my mother made vegetable lasagna. yummy! farewell! ps I am bored. Current Mood: bored Current Music: Braid
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Wednesday, July 21st, 2004
11:38 pm	My Hair. well, today i basically went to my morning japanese class, watched more videos on pronounciation, then i came home around one pm and I talked to a few online friends.After this, i went to get my haircut!yay!<3 im surprised that it looks so good. i was a bit afraid to cut it..my hair was actually getting long..but i suppose i wanted a more dramatic look. so, i got it cut. I was thinking about dying it dark too, but ive had dark hair forever..i used to dye it black. and besides, i like my streaked out hair. it adds that extra detail to my new cut so im pretty happy with the accomplished look, its very distinguished.<3 =) anywho i will take some pics of it tomorrow before i leave. im sure you will all like it. well,maybe. i guess it depends on your taste and idea of style. for now ill give u a description, its long and in one length on both sides, and the back is short?? Do you have a mental image of it yet? yes??? grand! well, farewell mwah! ps. I think I finally rid myself of this ongoing stress ive had. I havnt been sick for three days so im very relieved. anyway mwah!xoxox farewell!<3 Current Mood: energetic Current Music: The bled
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Sunday, July 18th, 2004
9:28 pm	happy. PHOTO OF RYAN!!! this is my new friend..hes gorgeous,he told me i was beauitiful. id prefer that word over hot any day! hot is more sexual like.and besides that, the word "hot" has been passed around as though it were a scone at a brittish tea party.eeeeekk... anyway,im gonna get a new haircut..it looks cool,i saw it in a magazine today. i will show rawjjer as soon as i can..looks like something hed like..anyhow i love u all. farewell. ps..today i woke up feeling great..i didnt feel sick at all.i hope this means my sickness will remain gone.!!
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Thursday, July 15th, 2004
8:19 pm	hmm im still sick and im sure i will remain this way untill all my stress is relieved but other then that..everything else is looking good...all of the little things that family,friends,and even internet friends like matthew...or rawjjer and even samantha seem to help me out alot....i love these people<3...idk if ill ever meet any of them but im thankful for knowing them at all. ummm tonight im going to go watch my best friend joeys band perform at thier first gig...that will be great..it will give me the advantage to forget about whats going on in reality...with family and stuff.. i will relax freely and enjoy myself. i love going uptown..its the best place to be..thats like our city hangout..theres always something to do..well, i suppose i will go and get ready...i have to be at the "silly monkey" by 9. farewell!!<3333 leave a comment and know that i love you guys! you have all been really good to me and i appreciate that.every little tid bit helps! Current Music: cursive:the ugly organ
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Wednesday, July 14th, 2004
11:25 am	stress okay so, im still sick.. i know its stress,like terribly..sometimes i feel as though as i could collapse...two yrs ago when i was 16 the same shit happened and i was sick for about three months before it finally went away..i guess thats because i decided to worry about everyone a little less and worry about myself instead.. i guess my problem is that i care too much about friends and family and thier problems...but what am i supposed to do not help them???? its going to be hard...i dont know what to do anymore.maybe its wise that i get out of the house more,maybe take things a little easier... anyways, leave a comment...and for those who have already left one in my other entrie. thankyou.<3 its nice to know people care.
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